Woes and Worries

So it has not been a good week for us. I'm just generally exhausted from school and cleaning and Logan and every other thing that places demands on my in my life. I had my algebra II midterm today and it did not go well at all, and it wasn't from a lack of studying because I did study I just didn't give myself enough time to study everything so about half way through my test I began to draw a complete blank, freeze up, and eventually after 1 1/2 hours I just turned in a half completed test. :(

Another thing that is worrying me is Logan has begun to self-harm himself. It sort of coincides with him saying that kids at school at picking on him/laughing at him and him moving up to a class with bigger kids. I had a chat with his teacher today who said she would keep an eye out... but I doubt it will change anything. I'm really worried about him. :( I asked him why he was hurting himself and he said "because I don't like myself" and I did what any mother would have done. I grabbed him and hugged him as tight as possible while choking back tears and telling him how much I loved him and how special he was. This is a behavioral issue I know needs to be nipped in the butt quickly so I think I'm going to go to school with him on wed and sit in his class and make sure he is ok and see if I can figure out what is really going on.

On a more positive note Logan's 4th birthday is this Sunday and our pirate party (arg!) is this weekend. :) Should be tons of fun if it doesn't rain (crossing my fingers it doesn't!). I'll make sure to post photos later next week.

I've really enjoyed coming back to blogging, maybe it will help me by being a great outlet. :)

Wow has it been that long?

We'll here we go again. I haven't blogged much in the last 2 1/2 years and I thought what the hell I'll start again.

So life has been hectic lately. I'm still in school (about to get my Associates in Liberal Arts), DH has an awesome new job as a lead/foreman with a solar installation company that totally rocks, and Logan is almost 4. WHAT really? Yep Logan will be 4 in exactly 10 days. Crazy I know! :)

March already has been packed and I'm really enjoying Logan at this age, while he has his days when he doesn't listen AT ALL (most commonly when he misses his nap) he's so entertaining to be around and is the brightest part of my day. We thought it was time we took a trip to Disneyland what with us living a meek 3 1/2 hours away in Central Cali it's not that big of a trip. We had a blast. :) I'll post pictures later.

After Disneyland we stayed at Camp Pendleton in Oceanside for 2 days, the marines there were so welcoming and gave Logan a personal tour of a tank, jeep and police car. We were staying there to attend the TAPS(Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors ... not The Atlantic Paranormal Society, lol) Good Grief Camp.

If you're not familiar with previous blogs or in case I never mentioned it, my brother was killed in Iraq in 2006. The camp was really hard for me, I always thought that as long as I didn't acknowledge his death in any way it wouldn't be true and having to say it in front of so many people was hard. Even typing this is hard. I miss him a lot.

Sunday the 6th was our final day in So Cal so we took advantage of it and took Logan to the San Diego zoo. All I can say is that those hills were KILLER, DH suggested I go to the zoo every day for a good work out and I told him I wouldn't mind living down there. :P

So that is that so far, I didn't intend to write so much on the get go but sometimes it just happens.

Oh I did forget to mention, we've been TTC again since July 2010. It's been a frustrating journey and I was finally diagnosed with PCOS in January of 2011. I'm currently taking Metformin and just started my first round of Clomid so wish me luck. I'm not really looking forward to a December baby but if it happens that way then oh well. :)

It's me again!

So I guess I'd forgotten about this blog for awhile, obviously since I hadn't updated it since May of LAST YEAR! Life goes on as usual.

Just an update

So it's been awhile since my last post! What's new you may be wondering - well nothing really. Life goes on as normal, Logan is one now and I'm still not back in school. We had hoped to get a second car sometime soon but that doesn't look possible and buying a house fell through horribly because of our bad credit - one of the many things that now got put on the back burner again. Homes here in our town as so ridiculously low right now, a new home is only 150k (low for an area that has an avg of 250k) and while we'd love to get one it's just not going to happen unfortunately.

I'm thinking of starting a bussiness making and selling baby/toddler items like appliqued onsies/shirts, bows, carriers, diaper bags, etc. We'll see how that goes since we are currently looking for a new home and thinking about maybe going the apartment route for now. A 3 bedroom with an area for me to work would be awesome right now! :) I plan to have all of this up and going by Oct the latest, so wish me luck on that.
My eventual dream would be to open a handmade baby boutique, though selling "name brand" items wouldn't hurt either. I've always want me own business but it's scary, I'd hate for it to fail and us to be even worse off then now.

*SIGH*

So on Friday we took a trip to Wells Fargo to discuss our pre approval for a loan. Turns out our credit has taken more of a turn for the worst than we expected. While I'd lost hope at first and kind of resigned to the fact that we wouldn't be able to get this property because of different factors, financially we could afford it but credit wise no bank would touch us. BUT today one of my friends introduced me to a government program that seems very prominent and well funded mainly because it's not well know. I won't name it for now but maybe when we have success with it I'll pass it on to my low-income friends and readers.
Anyway with this program for low-income households we will be able to get a 100% financed loan as long as we can prove that we're working with our creditors (which we have been). I have a few things to dispute on our credit report one of which is that BoA is claiming we owe 135$ (which has accumlated from apparently 7$ in finance charges! RIDIC!) on a credit card that was paid in full, closed, and no longer have access to! I really hate BoA and stupid me must have thrown out our last bill from back in June so I have no proof that the payoff amount was paid and not just the balance, but I do have the receipt of the payment and the amount so once I find out how much the payoff was I'll be able to prove them wrong!
I'm going to call the number I was given and really hope that they have funds and can help us, if not then I'll find out when they will get funds and work so hard to up our credit even more. My friend got preapproval for 150k for 400$ a month! can't beat that!

BTW my parents are again on their crazed "search-for-justice-staying-up-until-4am-annoying-the-hell-out-of-me-spree" so this program is my last hope to salvage my sanity.

The househunt continues..

so we looked at another home in Visalia today, this time to buy not rent. It was cute and small (around 1,000 sq ft) 3bdr/1bath on almost a half acre corner lot (+++!) BUT (there always seems to be "but" doesn't there?) it needs quite a bit of TLC, updating, remodeling, and all that fun stuff. It's a foreclosure, which we didn't know until we set up a showing and they told us, so I guess needing TLC is to be expected right? For the price they're asking it's not too bad and since it's currently a bank "short sale" they'd take way less since they want it gone.

I think Michael is fighting over the next step because of current events and also just buying and owning a home is a really huge thing! It's overwhelming! We haven't been pre qualified so we really need to see how much banks will give us and Tulare County has some good first time home buyer assistance stuff too (if all the funds aren't gone... I won't go into this right now...) that if we don't take advantage of within the next few years we may never qualify for it again because hopefully I'll be starting school for a career and then we'll make too much. I'm excited but scared all at the same time because it's such a great opportunity and I wish we were in just a little bit better of a situation right now! If we can get assistance I know we could do it no problem, so there is where it sits. Please send us positive "assistance" vibes!

I always end up getting way to ahead of myself thinking what we can do with this house, how we can make it better, how I will decorate it and all that only to be crushed when we really just can't swing it... I wish buying a home and living the "American Dream" was so much easier!

Something exciting happened today!

101 Dalmatians was released on DVD! :) I'm a dork I know it but that is my all time favorite movie, I had the VHS and I think I watched it just about everyday when I was younger. I love that now I've got the DVD and Logan can watch it with me. It's 2am and I just got back from buying it at our crazy 24 hour Walmart!

Seriously though, if you've got kids buy it! Best move ever.